Friends. How many of us have them?

*True Friends

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about the concept of “friendships.”  See to me friendships have always been a huge deal.  It’s not just, “Oh this is my friend so and so and we drink beers on the weekend, blah blah blah.”  No, that’s not it.  My friends have always been treated as if they’re a part of my family.  In my opinion, in some ways, friends are a little bit more important to me.  Now before I get the whole Latino community jumping down my back (as well as my own family members who read my blog) because family is huge for us, let me explain.  With family, you’re born into it.  Like them or not, love them or not, you’re stuck with each other forever.  You’re like squatters in each other’s lives;  Like that unsightly mole; Like an eyelash on your face that you keep trying to wipe away but just stays there!  You get the point.  I’m actually fortunate that many of my family members I can actually, tolerate and can consider good friends.  However, there are SOME members that I could surely do without; I’d give anything to have those moles surgically removed.  But that’s a different topic for a different day.

Friends are people YOU CHOOSE to have in your life.  When you meet someone, it’s completely your decision if you want to invest in them or not.  You can tell by a few meetings if this person is worth your time and energy, or not; much like any other relationship.  Now I’ve always chosen my friends by who’s most compatible with me, relates to me and can understand my sarcastic humor.  It’s the same way I’ve chosen the men I’ve dated.  Needless to say, my luck with friends hasn’t always been the best either!  See I find that the people you hang around with reflect the person you are.  My best friend for instance, is a sarcastic, witty, intelligent and a crazy gal.  Just like me!... Before I move on, I must add that you should never use the term “best friends” for everyone.  A best friend is someone who’s with you through thick and thin.  That person that you can call at 2am and they know it’s you and they know to get to the nearest bank to bail you out…  Then there are other friends, who though you may not have tons of things in common, you know that there are parts of them that you see in yourself; parts of yourself you wish to bring out, and they help you with that.  And then there are those “friends” that you thought you had things in common with or felt a connection to, and just like that douchebag ex-boyfriend of yours, they show their true colors and you’re blindsided by the “not so friendly” person that they truly are.

As we all know, family can, and most likely, will screw you over at one point in time.  But they’re family and you have to accept them.  Now when friends do it, while you can easily cast them off to the side and say, “good riddance to bad rubbish”, sometimes the pain stings a little more.  Why?   Well because you’ve opened yourself up to this person. You made the choice to let them in, thinking your assessment of the person was spot on, and you’re basically shown that you were dead wrong!  It can make you reevaluate other friendships and your own (what you thought to be) good judgment.  You start to wonder how you could have been so wrong about someone.  In fact you might start to feel a little stupid for having been so gullible.   And it doesn’t always have to be that they’ve done something terrible to you, i.e. burned down your house or anything like that.  It could just be their attitude and personality that changes.  Or you could realize that you’ve had blinders on to this person for whatever reason, and then BOOM, they’re different.  For example I had a best friend for years and we were almost inseparable.  And then one day she was dating, then getting pregnant, then getting engaged and poof it was as if she was gone.  It was like a relationship where the sex stopped being good, so you venture out.  It felt as if the friendship stopped being good, and it wasn’t worth keeping up with it.  And I understand we grow up and move on, and start lives on our own, but I never imagined that our friendship would just sizzle out.  While I'm sure I played a part in this as well (I guess we all change), it really hurt and still does.  See I use this as an example because I have another friend who has gone through the same process of “growing up” and we continue to be relevant and constant in each other’s lives.  It just gets a little sad when, as you grow up, you start to realize, as painful as it maybe, that all of your relationships aren’t as solid as you thought.  It’s not always rainbows and cotton candy.

So what does friendship mean to you?  Do you hold your friends in high regard or do friends just come and go for you?  I’m curious to see if I’m the only one that values my friendships as dearly as I value my relationships with my family member (if not more in some cases).  Hey, sometimes when family isn’t there, it’s those really good friends that are by your side when you lose your balance.

Happy Blogging All!

The Great Cake Debacle

MISS ME?! Well hopefully I've fixed the issue with my internet that's been affecting Google & Blogger, and I should be able to blog more frequently and you'll have to deal with me more! But anyway, I couldn't have come back at a better time, because I have a great story to tell you...

This past weekend was my best friend, Liz's, baby shower.  Now as y'all know, I'm not huge on kids, babies and all that jazz. But for some reason I'm super excited for this one.  I was especially excited because she chose to not reveal the sex of the baby until the day of the shower.  Now if you're in the "know" of current trends, then you know that there's a new one going around where the sex of the baby is revealed when the parents cut the cake.  See, if it's a girl the inside of the cake would be pink and if its a boy, blue.  So not only is it a surprise to the parents, but also their guests, who would be able to experience this joy with them.  So when Liz found out she was pregnant, she told her family that if the were to throw her a shower, this is what she'd like.  Cute idea right?  Well not when the baker is an IDIOT! Let me explain.

Her sister-in-law, Nana, was given a sealed envelope that was given to the happy parents by the doctor.  They didn't even open it!  They instructed Nana give it to the baker, never opening it herself, and only he/she would know what the sex was.  So after searching, she finally found a bakery that she knew had good tasting and looking cakes and who seemed to take pride in their work; Gino's Pastry Shop in the Bronx. After speaking to the baker and explaining what she wanted, she handed him the sealed envelope and left it his "capabale" hands.  So the day of the "big reveal" was finally here.  After greeting their guests,opening presents and everyone questioning and insisting over and over that they cut the cake, Liz and her husband decided it was time.  We all surrounded the cake as if the actual baby, not a color, was about to appear from this thing. I'm serious. Forget the Rapture, you would think Jesus himself was popping out of that cake and blessing us up into the gates of heaven, the way we looked.  So here go the happy parents to be, cutting that first slice together...

The cut to reveal what they're having!

BUT THEN...

Is it in there?...

They continued to cut and serve pieces of cake, all the while wondering if the next cut would make the big revelation.  It became obvious to all of us that that wouldn't happen. But can you blame the excited parents for thinking there might still be a chance that maybe half the cake or maybe the next tier would hide the answer?

Obviously, it did not.

At one point, they noticed writing on the panel that held the first tier.  Thinking the G they saw, stood for Girl, they tore into it more. It said...Gino!...  So of course a few people were upset, especially her sister-in-law.  So immediately Nana went outside to call the bakery.  At first there was no answer, but later she and the baker, named Jerome, began text messaging each other.  She proceeded to tell him that they had screwed up and what she ordered was NOT what she received.  He told her that he wasn't sure what had happened and she responded to him that he did not pay attention to this order as he said he would.  The instructions she gave him were very specific and where explained in person and over the phone. I mean that was the main purpose for ordering the cake; essentially they could have done it themselves, but wanted the talented hands of a professional.  He then, very arrogantly, told her that he could not talk as he was actually in the middle of being presented a prestigious award for his work and could be caught on NEWS12.  OK, are you freaking kidding me here?!  I had to see the message in which he said this, because clearly she was seeing things. But no, she wasn't, and he really did say this.  I swear, in the words of Mob Wife Drita (VH1's Mob Wives), I wanted to find this mans bakery and drive a car through it!  What professional, who takes pride in his work, would tell a customer something like this?  The audacity of him to cut her off because he's receiving some award, that I'm sure no one gives a damn about.  And to say it's for his work?  Are you sure about that?  Well I guess its obviously that award had nothing to do with customer service, because he failed miserably at that too.

Jerome, though he offered such a touching apology via text message (and if you can't read through that sarcasm, you haven't been following me long enough) ruined a very special moment for the parents and their family.  With good reason, she insisted on getting her money back and he finally agreed. However, not before he offered the following: 1. The reason they did not dye the cake was because his assistant had ordered the wrong dye. 2. He worked very hard on the outside of the cake...... OK, so now that you've read those two points over about 5 times, I'm assuming you all have the same question we did. So even though he knew he hadn't dyed the cake, he never bothered to 1. Call ahead of time to see if they even still wanted the cake since it wasn't what they originally ordered. 2. Or tell her when she picked up the cake that the main component of the cake, was missing!!!  This man and this bakery are a complete joke!  At least if Nana had been given the heads up from the bakery, she could've made a decision on whether to take it or not.  I'm sure they could've made other arrangements in regards to revealing the sex, and more than likely would've still paid for the cake. But they weren't given that option.  Did Gino's Pastry Shop really think that no one would notice the inside was just yellow and not blue or pink?  Again, the entire point of having this cake done by a bakery, was because they have experience with these types of orders and would of course be stocked with baking essentials!  Don't tell me that they don't make red velvet cupcakes there or that they don't do other types of cakes that would involve using dyes.  And the icing on the cake (pardon the pun) is when Nana went to pick up the refund, they just put it on the counter, not saying a word to her and walked away.  Thats right, they never offered her an in person explanation or apology. Yes, because that's how you keep them coming back and show you value your customers.  The nerve!  

Can you imagine going through something like this?  Having a beautiful day ruined and not even offered some type of explanation.  Writing this now, I'm still in shock and pissed off, and it wasn't even my event!  My main point of writing this blog, is to warn everyone of this bakery and in general all places where you go expecting to get a job done; whether it be a cleaners, salons, car shops, etc. I'm not saying to never buy at this bakery again, though the thought crossed my mind... OK, so to my friends, never go there again, OK? Agreed? Good. :).... You really have to be careful who you trust to do things for you, even if you are paying for it; apparently payment for a job means nothing!  I mean essentially the work done on the outside of the cake was really nice; I loved the little bees. HOWEVER when someone is paid for a specific job, you expect that said job to be done to the best of their ability.  And if it isn't done in that manner or an issue arises, then you expect to be told about it and offered a solution, and not after the fact!  Obviously Gino's Pastry Shop (and I hate repeating there name, but its' more so you know who messed up this event) & Jerome do not feel that way.  So should you decide to go to this bakery, make sure before you leave, you've gotten what you paid for! 

Happy Blogging All!

Wordless Wednesday

Me, Liz & A Baby

Thankful Thursdays

Today, on this lovely Thursday March 24th, I am thankful for my besties: Lity, Gata & Chicky.

Me, Gata, Lity & Chicky

These girls are always there when I need them, no matter what.  They will listen to me make more than a Monday Grievance complaint, since I complain almost everyday.  When I say I'm fat, they tell me I'm not and to have another burger.  When I say I'm broke, they offer to buy me a margarita.  When I complain about Monkey (the boyfriend) they calm me down and remind me that just like any guy, he is a boy, and that's what they do. When I planned a spur of the moment birthday trip to Miami in a month, they were right there next to me planning away.  Besides the family I already have, if God asked us what family members we'd want, these girls would be requested ASAP; I'd actually replace them now with some family members, hahaha.  But I can  always count on them, which is strange for me.  Growing up I had one really good friend and the rest of the girls I was never that close with.  I always thought that having friends that were girls was too much of a hassle.  We women can be very dramatic and emotional and also very caddy.  There are some girls that can be your "best friend", but be jealous of you or expect you to be jealous of them, or put you down or even though they say they want the best for you, when you're knocked down, they take a little pleasure out of it.  Thankfully I found these three girls whom, I never have the problem with.

When there is an issue we bring it up with each other.  We fight, make-up and go about our business.  These are the ladies whom if we got arrested with each other would laugh and defend one another 'til the end.  We can laugh about the stupidest things and only we understand and get each other.  If I buy something that looks stupid, they'll tell me.  If I'm having a bad hair day, they will call me out.  If I have beer goggles (when I'm single) they will quickly pull my arm off in order to get me away from any Gary Busey look a like.  I could go on and on, but I don't want to be mushy, because that's not my attitude at all.  And besides you guys read my blogs to hear me bitch and moan, not praise people LOL.  Well at least this proves that I have friends and am not as miserable as I may sometimes appear.

Don't forget to share what you're thankful for. :)

Happy Blogging All!

P.S.  I do have two other besties, my Lisa P. and my Mich Mich, whom I also adore and love.  These are ladies I also rely on when the chips are down and are incredible women.  I'm shouting the three above out because I'm with them or speak to them about my BS on a daily basis.  I still have love for you ladies, so don't be upset, offended or send me hate mail; I'll just ignore you and delete. Hahahaha.  Here's pictures of us to prove I love you too. :)

Me & My big sister Lisa

Me & Mich Mich