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| Packing for a 3 day vacation. YIKES! |
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Monday, June 27, 2011
Monday Grievances: The Murphy Chronicles
Murphy's Laws:
"If anything can go wrong, it will"
"If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong."
"If everything seems to be going well, you've obviously overlooked something."
I tend to complain a lot (as you all know). But I swear it's not on purpose; believe me. If you know me, you know that I tend to not have the best luck in the world. In fact, when it sounds like I'm complaining, I'm really just telling a story. My last boyfriend used to listen to many of these stories and one day just blurted out, "I'm just gonna call you Murphy from now on." He got it right on the nose, because anything that can happen to me, will. Let's explore my life this past month and you'll see why I say this (I warn you, this will be lengthy)...
So as you all know I started a new job. Well of course one of the best things about having a job, is having benefits. It was the reason I started my job on a Friday rather than a Monday; so that I could be eligible for them sooner rather than later. So when I got the information, I did all my benefits stuff online, clicked confirm and then waited for my benefits package to arrive. Well about 3 weeks ago I started to have some pain in my ankles and in my right knee. Now I had gone out the weekend of Memorial day and I thought it was because of the heels I'd worn. I rarely wear heels and these were THE heels of all heels for me; they were really high. I tried to ignore the pain, even though it really bothered me. The following weekend I had the worst migraine headache. I've gotten migraines for years, so I'm sort of used to them. However this one was on and off all weekend, and I had to call out of work that Monday because the pain and the sensitivity to light was just too much. While laying in bed dying from the pain, I suddenly thought, "Hey, I haven't gotten any of my insurance information. Where the hell are my cards?" So I went into work that Tuesday and contacted my HR person. We went back and forth and she basically told me my days to claim benefits had passed and I would have to wait until November. I almost lost it, but kept my composure. I kept telling her that I did indeed apply and entered all of my information, but never received this so called "confirmation number" she kept going on about. After continuing on and on, and her "digging" for information, she found that I would have to contact the benefits center and appeal the whole process and then wait to see if they would "approve" or "deny" me.
Now while I've been waiting the past two weeks to hear if I'm approved, the pain in my ankles and knees has not only increased, but I am now experiencing pain in my hands, arms and shoulders. So what do I do in the meantime? I go on to WEB MD to self diagnosis myself. Because of course I'm a doctor and I'll be able to figure it out. Makes perfect sense...NOT! So now, according to this fabulous site that has scared the shit out of me, I either have Lupus or Rheumatoid Arthritis. And no, as much as I joke around, I am not kidding. For example, I have heater under my desk at work. We're not really suppose to have them, so every night I have to bend down and hide it behind my filing cabinet. One day I went to bend down...I could not get up. It took me about two minutes until the guy that sits next to me asked me if I wanted help. I politely declined and forced my ass to get up alone. When I finally did manage to life my fat ass up, I looked at my right hand and noticed that it was swollen as if I had slammed it in a car door. Even the guy next to me noticed and was surprised, asking me what the hell I had done to myself while I was on the floor. By the time I had gotten home, my entire arm was swelling. The next day my mom told me to buy myself "Move Free". What says sexy more than a 28 year old Puerto Rican hottie buying over the counter Arthritis drugs. Remember men, I'm still available!
Now as this pain continues to come and go, I wake up last Monday morning with my tooth hurting.... A little history: my wisdom teeth on the bottom are horizontal. Therefore according to the dentist, they'll never grow out. They may bother me from time to time, but there really isn't a reason to pull them.... As the day went on, I noticed as I was trying to chew, that the gum behind the tooth started to get swollen. WTF is with me and swelling?! The next day it was worse. I could barely talk and started to sound a lot like Susie from Basketball Wives. At this point I decided it was time to call benefits again to see what was happening with my "appeal". I was basically told that my appeal was received and being "processed" and that I basically have to wait for the boards decision. Just wonderful! I then came home that Tuesday evening to a Jury Summons. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!... Wait let me explain why I'm upset first. Its not because like most people I hate being bothered by Jury Duty. No. It's because back in October of 2009 I served on a criminal case for 9 days. They were the worse nine days ever. The images that I saw will never leave my mind. The only good thing about actually serving on a trial in NYC, is that for 6 years you don't have to serve.... Now I had received a summons previously in January of this year as well. I called the court house and explained to them that I had already served almost two years ago. Now I had received the summons to late to mail anything in, so the woman I spoke to told me to postpone it and the mail in the "certificate of service" afterwards; which is exactly what I did. So now I come home to this BS. PLUS the day I'm suppose to report, I'll be on a plane coming home from San Antonio. So once again, I mailed out the summons, along with a copy of my "certificate of service" and a letter stating that this is what I was told to do, AGAIN!
The only positive thing, was that I was able to get my hands on some antibiotics; but it wasn't enough. By the time Thursday came around the pain and swelling was still there, and had become unbearable. I had spoken to a few friends who told me I should go to a dental clinic, where basically it's students who will see you, but is great for people who don't really have a lot of money and no insurance. So I finally went and spent 2 hours at this clinic. The "dentist" who looked so confused, was trying her best to assess my situation. She saw that my tooth was swollen and decided to take ex-rays. After jabbing this metal piece of I don't know what into my mouth and cutting me!... No, I didn't hit her. Mainly because she was PREGNANT!... She finally took me to a room where they have an ex-ray machine that scans your entire head. If you've ever seen one of these, you know that it basically locks your head into position while this machine goes around you. And if you didn't know this about me, I'm COMPLETELY claustrophobic. After the technician locked me in place, she kept talking about something, until I finally yelled out, "Can you hurry up and take the picture." It was very loud and actually inaudible since I was biting down on some mouth piece they had on the machine. After the "dentist" consulted with the real Dentist, they decided that this tooth just had to come out. I told them that this had happened previously and explained what my last dentist had said. Regardless they felt this tooth had to come out. Listen lady, I just want more antibiotics to take away the swelling and the pain! But this is a teaching school so they're hungry to make patients into guinea pigs so that the students can learn. I'm all for education, but not when it involves me or any of my body parts. The referred me to oral surgery and told me to come back for a consultation later that day. The "dentist" told me that after the consultation I could probably get the meds. So I said fine and came back..... Please take a moment to go and use the bathroom or grab a drink of water. I told you this would be lengthy, but I'm almost done...
I came back later that evening and waited for my consultation along with some interesting people. Between the ghetto people screaming, the old people complaining and one man who I'm sure was special needs (and I'm not saying that in an insulting way at all. I just felt bad for him because I really don't think she should've been there by himself), I thought I'd lose my mind. Finally my name is called. As I was about to get up, this little girl comes running over to me. I swear she looked about 15, if that. She proceeded to tell me, "I'm sorry but all of the chairs are taken, so we won't be able to do the extraction today." I said, "Excuse me? What are you talking about? I'm here for a consultation." She says, "Oh yes, we do a consultation and then we do the extraction." I was in shock?! Since when is that the case with ANY consultation?! She then said she'd be right back and ran off. I sat down flabbergasted. What the hell makes them think that I'm just going to let them rip my tooth out?! No one told me this? As all this is going through my head, I hear another "dentist" talking to one of the patients (in front of about 20 other patients) saying she had just finished a final that was really hard. The patient asked her how she thought she did and she said, "I don't know man, it was really really hard. There were some things on there I didn't even understand." ARE YOU SHITTING?! And I'm suppose to let one of these kids hack into my mouth. Yea, I don't think so. When my "dentist' came back, she pulled me into a room to "examine the situation". Clearly I was in pain and still swollen, when she stuck her finger in my mouth, touched my gum and said, "It doesn't look bad." I had finally reached my boiling point. I told her "Ma'am, I can't chew, I can barely speak and I can't close my mouth. I need you to give me a prescription to make this swelling and the pain go away. I am not going to take out my tooth!" She finally looked at me as a person and not a lab rat and went to speak to the Dentist in charge. The only way I was able to get my prescription, was to schedule an appointment for an extraction. I got my prescription and made the stupid appointment. I also, canceled the appointment.
When I woke up the next day, I could hear the birds chirping and the rain hitting my window. My eyes popped open and the first thing I did was bit down. I was finally able to close my mouth! Woohoo! I thought it was the best thing to happen to me in weeks. I could tell the swelling was still there, but I could finally say "Yes" and not "Yethhh". I then proceeded to get up, using my right arm to lift me, when I immediately felt a sharp pain shoot from my wrist to my shoulder, and fell right back down on the bed. I tried lifting my legs and swinging them over the bed, when I realized I could barely bend my knees. At this point, I just bursted into laughter. I mean I literally sat on my bed, just laughing by myself. Oh that arthritis pain was not only back with a vengeance, but it had gotten into my shoulders. Finally I could chew food again, but I could barely get up and walk or do my hair. If its not one thing, it's another. So that my friends has been my past month. The only thing that shines a bit of light at the end of this horrible months tunnel is that I'll be visiting my friend Lisa in SA this Friday! I haven't seen her in forever and miss her terrible. I think I deserve this vacation. Don't you? I finally get to relax and enjoy life a little. OH and guess who else is joining me on this vacation?! Aunt Flo!!! I guess she knows very well that I just hate to travel alone. Yup, like I said, if it's not one thing... Hopefully my friend "arthritis" will leave me alone long enough to enjoy some of my time there. Wish me luck my friends!
Happy Blogging All!
"If anything can go wrong, it will"
"If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong."
"If everything seems to be going well, you've obviously overlooked something."
I tend to complain a lot (as you all know). But I swear it's not on purpose; believe me. If you know me, you know that I tend to not have the best luck in the world. In fact, when it sounds like I'm complaining, I'm really just telling a story. My last boyfriend used to listen to many of these stories and one day just blurted out, "I'm just gonna call you Murphy from now on." He got it right on the nose, because anything that can happen to me, will. Let's explore my life this past month and you'll see why I say this (I warn you, this will be lengthy)...
So as you all know I started a new job. Well of course one of the best things about having a job, is having benefits. It was the reason I started my job on a Friday rather than a Monday; so that I could be eligible for them sooner rather than later. So when I got the information, I did all my benefits stuff online, clicked confirm and then waited for my benefits package to arrive. Well about 3 weeks ago I started to have some pain in my ankles and in my right knee. Now I had gone out the weekend of Memorial day and I thought it was because of the heels I'd worn. I rarely wear heels and these were THE heels of all heels for me; they were really high. I tried to ignore the pain, even though it really bothered me. The following weekend I had the worst migraine headache. I've gotten migraines for years, so I'm sort of used to them. However this one was on and off all weekend, and I had to call out of work that Monday because the pain and the sensitivity to light was just too much. While laying in bed dying from the pain, I suddenly thought, "Hey, I haven't gotten any of my insurance information. Where the hell are my cards?" So I went into work that Tuesday and contacted my HR person. We went back and forth and she basically told me my days to claim benefits had passed and I would have to wait until November. I almost lost it, but kept my composure. I kept telling her that I did indeed apply and entered all of my information, but never received this so called "confirmation number" she kept going on about. After continuing on and on, and her "digging" for information, she found that I would have to contact the benefits center and appeal the whole process and then wait to see if they would "approve" or "deny" me.
Now while I've been waiting the past two weeks to hear if I'm approved, the pain in my ankles and knees has not only increased, but I am now experiencing pain in my hands, arms and shoulders. So what do I do in the meantime? I go on to WEB MD to self diagnosis myself. Because of course I'm a doctor and I'll be able to figure it out. Makes perfect sense...NOT! So now, according to this fabulous site that has scared the shit out of me, I either have Lupus or Rheumatoid Arthritis. And no, as much as I joke around, I am not kidding. For example, I have heater under my desk at work. We're not really suppose to have them, so every night I have to bend down and hide it behind my filing cabinet. One day I went to bend down...I could not get up. It took me about two minutes until the guy that sits next to me asked me if I wanted help. I politely declined and forced my ass to get up alone. When I finally did manage to life my fat ass up, I looked at my right hand and noticed that it was swollen as if I had slammed it in a car door. Even the guy next to me noticed and was surprised, asking me what the hell I had done to myself while I was on the floor. By the time I had gotten home, my entire arm was swelling. The next day my mom told me to buy myself "Move Free". What says sexy more than a 28 year old Puerto Rican hottie buying over the counter Arthritis drugs. Remember men, I'm still available!
Now as this pain continues to come and go, I wake up last Monday morning with my tooth hurting.... A little history: my wisdom teeth on the bottom are horizontal. Therefore according to the dentist, they'll never grow out. They may bother me from time to time, but there really isn't a reason to pull them.... As the day went on, I noticed as I was trying to chew, that the gum behind the tooth started to get swollen. WTF is with me and swelling?! The next day it was worse. I could barely talk and started to sound a lot like Susie from Basketball Wives. At this point I decided it was time to call benefits again to see what was happening with my "appeal". I was basically told that my appeal was received and being "processed" and that I basically have to wait for the boards decision. Just wonderful! I then came home that Tuesday evening to a Jury Summons. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!... Wait let me explain why I'm upset first. Its not because like most people I hate being bothered by Jury Duty. No. It's because back in October of 2009 I served on a criminal case for 9 days. They were the worse nine days ever. The images that I saw will never leave my mind. The only good thing about actually serving on a trial in NYC, is that for 6 years you don't have to serve.... Now I had received a summons previously in January of this year as well. I called the court house and explained to them that I had already served almost two years ago. Now I had received the summons to late to mail anything in, so the woman I spoke to told me to postpone it and the mail in the "certificate of service" afterwards; which is exactly what I did. So now I come home to this BS. PLUS the day I'm suppose to report, I'll be on a plane coming home from San Antonio. So once again, I mailed out the summons, along with a copy of my "certificate of service" and a letter stating that this is what I was told to do, AGAIN!
The only positive thing, was that I was able to get my hands on some antibiotics; but it wasn't enough. By the time Thursday came around the pain and swelling was still there, and had become unbearable. I had spoken to a few friends who told me I should go to a dental clinic, where basically it's students who will see you, but is great for people who don't really have a lot of money and no insurance. So I finally went and spent 2 hours at this clinic. The "dentist" who looked so confused, was trying her best to assess my situation. She saw that my tooth was swollen and decided to take ex-rays. After jabbing this metal piece of I don't know what into my mouth and cutting me!... No, I didn't hit her. Mainly because she was PREGNANT!... She finally took me to a room where they have an ex-ray machine that scans your entire head. If you've ever seen one of these, you know that it basically locks your head into position while this machine goes around you. And if you didn't know this about me, I'm COMPLETELY claustrophobic. After the technician locked me in place, she kept talking about something, until I finally yelled out, "Can you hurry up and take the picture." It was very loud and actually inaudible since I was biting down on some mouth piece they had on the machine. After the "dentist" consulted with the real Dentist, they decided that this tooth just had to come out. I told them that this had happened previously and explained what my last dentist had said. Regardless they felt this tooth had to come out. Listen lady, I just want more antibiotics to take away the swelling and the pain! But this is a teaching school so they're hungry to make patients into guinea pigs so that the students can learn. I'm all for education, but not when it involves me or any of my body parts. The referred me to oral surgery and told me to come back for a consultation later that day. The "dentist" told me that after the consultation I could probably get the meds. So I said fine and came back..... Please take a moment to go and use the bathroom or grab a drink of water. I told you this would be lengthy, but I'm almost done...
I came back later that evening and waited for my consultation along with some interesting people. Between the ghetto people screaming, the old people complaining and one man who I'm sure was special needs (and I'm not saying that in an insulting way at all. I just felt bad for him because I really don't think she should've been there by himself), I thought I'd lose my mind. Finally my name is called. As I was about to get up, this little girl comes running over to me. I swear she looked about 15, if that. She proceeded to tell me, "I'm sorry but all of the chairs are taken, so we won't be able to do the extraction today." I said, "Excuse me? What are you talking about? I'm here for a consultation." She says, "Oh yes, we do a consultation and then we do the extraction." I was in shock?! Since when is that the case with ANY consultation?! She then said she'd be right back and ran off. I sat down flabbergasted. What the hell makes them think that I'm just going to let them rip my tooth out?! No one told me this? As all this is going through my head, I hear another "dentist" talking to one of the patients (in front of about 20 other patients) saying she had just finished a final that was really hard. The patient asked her how she thought she did and she said, "I don't know man, it was really really hard. There were some things on there I didn't even understand." ARE YOU SHITTING?! And I'm suppose to let one of these kids hack into my mouth. Yea, I don't think so. When my "dentist' came back, she pulled me into a room to "examine the situation". Clearly I was in pain and still swollen, when she stuck her finger in my mouth, touched my gum and said, "It doesn't look bad." I had finally reached my boiling point. I told her "Ma'am, I can't chew, I can barely speak and I can't close my mouth. I need you to give me a prescription to make this swelling and the pain go away. I am not going to take out my tooth!" She finally looked at me as a person and not a lab rat and went to speak to the Dentist in charge. The only way I was able to get my prescription, was to schedule an appointment for an extraction. I got my prescription and made the stupid appointment. I also, canceled the appointment.
When I woke up the next day, I could hear the birds chirping and the rain hitting my window. My eyes popped open and the first thing I did was bit down. I was finally able to close my mouth! Woohoo! I thought it was the best thing to happen to me in weeks. I could tell the swelling was still there, but I could finally say "Yes" and not "Yethhh". I then proceeded to get up, using my right arm to lift me, when I immediately felt a sharp pain shoot from my wrist to my shoulder, and fell right back down on the bed. I tried lifting my legs and swinging them over the bed, when I realized I could barely bend my knees. At this point, I just bursted into laughter. I mean I literally sat on my bed, just laughing by myself. Oh that arthritis pain was not only back with a vengeance, but it had gotten into my shoulders. Finally I could chew food again, but I could barely get up and walk or do my hair. If its not one thing, it's another. So that my friends has been my past month. The only thing that shines a bit of light at the end of this horrible months tunnel is that I'll be visiting my friend Lisa in SA this Friday! I haven't seen her in forever and miss her terrible. I think I deserve this vacation. Don't you? I finally get to relax and enjoy life a little. OH and guess who else is joining me on this vacation?! Aunt Flo!!! I guess she knows very well that I just hate to travel alone. Yup, like I said, if it's not one thing... Hopefully my friend "arthritis" will leave me alone long enough to enjoy some of my time there. Wish me luck my friends!
Happy Blogging All!
Thursday, June 23, 2011
12 Things About ME!!!!
Before there was, La Latina Loquita, I was just a little loquita kid. So here are 12 things you don't know about little me, and I probably shouldn't reveal... For the record, I know I was a WEIRD child.
1. When I was younger I loved playing with Barbies. Except while all my friends had their dolls getting married and starting families, my dolls were having a lot of premarital sex and abortions.
2. When all the little girls where picking out dresses, and while my mom dressed me up like a doll on many occasions, I secretly just wanted to be in overalls and sneakers. I didn't want to be a pretty pretty princess, because I didn't think I was a pretty anything.
3. As a child when I got in trouble, I truly waited for G.I. Joe to come in and rescue me. See, in the cartoons' opening credits, they said something along the lines of "We're there when you're in trouble." And I kept thinking, "Hello, major trouble here. Where are you?!" I was unique... Shut up.
4. I thought I could blame anything on an animal and it was believable. For example, I broke my dads maracas by banging them against each other one to many times, just a little to hard. I then tried to blame the cat, saying she clawed at them very aggressively and they eventually busted. I thought I was quite convincing. I was punished for a week.
5. I believed in The Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus until I was 11 years old, in the 6th grade. I only found out the truth when I lost my tooth in the middle of the night and woke my mother up to tell her. She told me to go back to sleep and I did...sort of. I thought if I stayed up, I could catch the tooth fairy bringing me the money, and capture her and therefore be rich forever. As I was dreaming up how I'd catch our little Tinkerbell, I saw my mother fumble in the dark to put the money on my nightstand. I. WAS. DESTROYED! The next day, not only did I reveal to her that the "tooth fairy" left me 20 dollars (a mistake), but that I clearly saw HER leave the money. I then asked her if she have anything else to tell me. I then found out the truth about Santa.
6. I was obsessed with my mother. I needed to know where she was at all times. I'd call her to see why she was running late from work. If I went on vacation without her (which happened often, as I was shipped off to Puerto Rico every Summer) I would cry the entire time until it was time to go back home. If she went across the street to have tea with my Godmother, I would call over there at least 10 times before she'd finally come home. This woman was like my legs; I could not function without her.
7. When my sister was born (note: for 16 years I was alone & spoiled) I hated her. When my mother was in the hospital, after giving birth, I was taken to go see her and my new sister. I walked in, saw this 8lb monster and said, "OK, can we go now?" Later we had to get rid of our dog because he was jealous of her and tried to bite her. My response to this was, "Get rid of her; he's been here longer!" I was VERY serious, but did not win the fight... Yes, yes, I love her now... a little. :)
8. When I was younger, I used to act and sing in front of my mirror, creating theme songs and different facial expressions, and imagine I was starring in my own television show. For example, I'd hum some weird 90's tv show like music and smile or make weird faces in the mirror and freeze, then pretend underneath me was the name of whatever character I was portraying.
9. I loved anything Freddy Krueger. I wasn't afraid of him at all. In fact I thought he had an amazing sense of humor. For example, in one of the movies, he's feeding a girl her own stomach and says, "you are what you eat." I just thought "Oh Freddy."
10. I used to think that if I concentrated hard enough, I could stop time just like Eve Garland in "Out Of This World." I think the strain is what started my migraines.
11. Those of you who know me in real life, not blog life, think I talk a lot. But NOOOO! When I was younger I talked so much more and alllll the time. I'd talk about the bird I saw in the tree, the gum I was chewing, why that woman's hair was styled that way. I'd ask questions about this, that and the third and just would go on and on for hours. One day we were driving home from a long day of shopping and me talking. As I was asking where we were going to dinner, and what we were going to eat, and what time we'd get home, my mother finally turned around and yelled, "OMG, SHUT UP! STOP TALKING! YOU'RE NOT NORMAL!!!!". I was in shock and then proceeded to cry...At the restaurant, everyone told me to cheer up and not to be sad, so of course I started talking again. I got over that quickly, because nothing stops me from talking. :)
12. I used to practice kissing everything, in case anyone ever tried to kiss me. I kissed my hand, my pillow, the wall, the dog, whatever I could. When a boy finally went in for the kill, I choked (literally) and almost vomited in his mouth.
In my defense, I was the only child in my house until I was 16; I needed to entertain myself. :-/ Anyway, hope you enjoyed getting to learn a little more about La Latina Loquita.
Happy Blogging All!
 |
| I kissed that poster too! :) |
1. When I was younger I loved playing with Barbies. Except while all my friends had their dolls getting married and starting families, my dolls were having a lot of premarital sex and abortions.
2. When all the little girls where picking out dresses, and while my mom dressed me up like a doll on many occasions, I secretly just wanted to be in overalls and sneakers. I didn't want to be a pretty pretty princess, because I didn't think I was a pretty anything.
3. As a child when I got in trouble, I truly waited for G.I. Joe to come in and rescue me. See, in the cartoons' opening credits, they said something along the lines of "We're there when you're in trouble." And I kept thinking, "Hello, major trouble here. Where are you?!" I was unique... Shut up.
4. I thought I could blame anything on an animal and it was believable. For example, I broke my dads maracas by banging them against each other one to many times, just a little to hard. I then tried to blame the cat, saying she clawed at them very aggressively and they eventually busted. I thought I was quite convincing. I was punished for a week.
5. I believed in The Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus until I was 11 years old, in the 6th grade. I only found out the truth when I lost my tooth in the middle of the night and woke my mother up to tell her. She told me to go back to sleep and I did...sort of. I thought if I stayed up, I could catch the tooth fairy bringing me the money, and capture her and therefore be rich forever. As I was dreaming up how I'd catch our little Tinkerbell, I saw my mother fumble in the dark to put the money on my nightstand. I. WAS. DESTROYED! The next day, not only did I reveal to her that the "tooth fairy" left me 20 dollars (a mistake), but that I clearly saw HER leave the money. I then asked her if she have anything else to tell me. I then found out the truth about Santa.
6. I was obsessed with my mother. I needed to know where she was at all times. I'd call her to see why she was running late from work. If I went on vacation without her (which happened often, as I was shipped off to Puerto Rico every Summer) I would cry the entire time until it was time to go back home. If she went across the street to have tea with my Godmother, I would call over there at least 10 times before she'd finally come home. This woman was like my legs; I could not function without her.
7. When my sister was born (note: for 16 years I was alone & spoiled) I hated her. When my mother was in the hospital, after giving birth, I was taken to go see her and my new sister. I walked in, saw this 8lb monster and said, "OK, can we go now?" Later we had to get rid of our dog because he was jealous of her and tried to bite her. My response to this was, "Get rid of her; he's been here longer!" I was VERY serious, but did not win the fight... Yes, yes, I love her now... a little. :)
8. When I was younger, I used to act and sing in front of my mirror, creating theme songs and different facial expressions, and imagine I was starring in my own television show. For example, I'd hum some weird 90's tv show like music and smile or make weird faces in the mirror and freeze, then pretend underneath me was the name of whatever character I was portraying.
9. I loved anything Freddy Krueger. I wasn't afraid of him at all. In fact I thought he had an amazing sense of humor. For example, in one of the movies, he's feeding a girl her own stomach and says, "you are what you eat." I just thought "Oh Freddy."
10. I used to think that if I concentrated hard enough, I could stop time just like Eve Garland in "Out Of This World." I think the strain is what started my migraines.
11. Those of you who know me in real life, not blog life, think I talk a lot. But NOOOO! When I was younger I talked so much more and alllll the time. I'd talk about the bird I saw in the tree, the gum I was chewing, why that woman's hair was styled that way. I'd ask questions about this, that and the third and just would go on and on for hours. One day we were driving home from a long day of shopping and me talking. As I was asking where we were going to dinner, and what we were going to eat, and what time we'd get home, my mother finally turned around and yelled, "OMG, SHUT UP! STOP TALKING! YOU'RE NOT NORMAL!!!!". I was in shock and then proceeded to cry...At the restaurant, everyone told me to cheer up and not to be sad, so of course I started talking again. I got over that quickly, because nothing stops me from talking. :)
12. I used to practice kissing everything, in case anyone ever tried to kiss me. I kissed my hand, my pillow, the wall, the dog, whatever I could. When a boy finally went in for the kill, I choked (literally) and almost vomited in his mouth.
In my defense, I was the only child in my house until I was 16; I needed to entertain myself. :-/ Anyway, hope you enjoyed getting to learn a little more about La Latina Loquita.
Happy Blogging All!
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Curiosity Killed The...Relationship
There comes a time in a relationship where things get a little weird. He or she isn't returning your calls as quickly as they used to. They seem to be more distant and/or busy. Or they're staying at work really late. Or suddenly start mentioning new "friends" that you've never heard of. And that is when your mind starts to wander and you get blurred by all of the issues that, clearly you've developed in your head, seem to be arising in the relationship. So what do you do? You decide to become inspector gadget and start investigating into what the hell is going on. Or you're just a nosy person, and decide to snoop. You tell yourself that you trust them and it's just to ease your own worries. But lets be honest, there is doubt there, and not a lot (if any) trust. After speaking to a few of my friends, I realized I wasn't the only one guilty of having done this. I also wasn't the only one that said, "But I had great reason to". But you have to wonder, if you feel the need to become an investigator in your relationship, maybe the issue is bigger than what's lying on the surface.
For example, you find an email saved in your significant others drafts and notice that it was written to their ex right around the time you started dating. Thought it was never sent, you decide to read it and there are quite a few things in there that you're not comfortable with. Rather than ask them directly what's going on, you wait and start going through their phones, computer documents, car, receipts from KFC to make sure there's only 1 meal accounted for on it, etc. You drive yourself insane for weeks, instead of confronting the issue head on. When you finally do confront the situation, whether you have proof or not, you start to mention things that have absolutely nothing to do with what's going on. You start yelling at them for getting haircuts every 3 weeks. Or taking two showers a day, and ignore the fact that it's 100 degrees outside and your partner has a perfectly good reason to do so.
Another example, is that your significant other is constantly on their phone. Either talking, texting, emailing or just playing games because they've grown a disgusting addiction to "play words with friends". So now you get jealous because they're always on their phone. It seems like this phone is their partner, and not you. One day out of the blue you decide to go through it, and guess what, your boyfriend/girlfriend/fiance/wife/husband is right behind you and catches you. You of course come up with some lie, such as, "it was ringing so I was going to turn it off" or "I was going to bring it to you." Contrary to what we would love to believe sometimes, our partners are not as dumb as we make them out to be. So now you've open up a can of worms because their upset you've gone through their phone. And you're upset because, what's the big deal if you've gone through their phone; what are they hiding? Then WW3 has stared and no one, not even the roaches, is safe from the drama that is about to ensue.
Now I could go on and on with different scenarios after the other. The big question in all of this, is do you snoop? If you do, what do you gain? Peace of mind? But if that's all you're after, why not ask the person you're in the relationship with, what the issue is, if there is an issue, and resolve it that way. Yes, that person may lie to you and tell you everything is peaches and rose petals. But if your gut instinct tells you something is wrong, then believe it. Because 9 times out of 10, your gut instinct is correct. And besides, if you don't trust or believe this person, why would you continue to have them in your life. No its not easy to give up on a relationship, especially if you've put a lot of time and effort into it. But does all the time and effort mean sacrificing your own happiness; your own sanity. I mean eventually, whether there is something to find or not, you will drive yourself nuts.
So if theirs an issue, confront it and move on. If you feel that something is amiss, then you need to talk it out or it's going to eat away at you and your relationship. Doing these side investigations, may help you feel better, but in the end, what is it really doing to you? It says more about you (and not in a good way), than it says about the person you're with. And even if you're right about whatever it is you find, what good does it do you; you're still left with questions and feeling hurt. Am I right or wrong? Please comment on this, especially the men out there (if any of the men read this), because we know that dudes get checked up on a lot more than us ladies do. :)
Happy Blogging All!
For example, you find an email saved in your significant others drafts and notice that it was written to their ex right around the time you started dating. Thought it was never sent, you decide to read it and there are quite a few things in there that you're not comfortable with. Rather than ask them directly what's going on, you wait and start going through their phones, computer documents, car, receipts from KFC to make sure there's only 1 meal accounted for on it, etc. You drive yourself insane for weeks, instead of confronting the issue head on. When you finally do confront the situation, whether you have proof or not, you start to mention things that have absolutely nothing to do with what's going on. You start yelling at them for getting haircuts every 3 weeks. Or taking two showers a day, and ignore the fact that it's 100 degrees outside and your partner has a perfectly good reason to do so.
Another example, is that your significant other is constantly on their phone. Either talking, texting, emailing or just playing games because they've grown a disgusting addiction to "play words with friends". So now you get jealous because they're always on their phone. It seems like this phone is their partner, and not you. One day out of the blue you decide to go through it, and guess what, your boyfriend/girlfriend/fiance/wife/husband is right behind you and catches you. You of course come up with some lie, such as, "it was ringing so I was going to turn it off" or "I was going to bring it to you." Contrary to what we would love to believe sometimes, our partners are not as dumb as we make them out to be. So now you've open up a can of worms because their upset you've gone through their phone. And you're upset because, what's the big deal if you've gone through their phone; what are they hiding? Then WW3 has stared and no one, not even the roaches, is safe from the drama that is about to ensue.
Now I could go on and on with different scenarios after the other. The big question in all of this, is do you snoop? If you do, what do you gain? Peace of mind? But if that's all you're after, why not ask the person you're in the relationship with, what the issue is, if there is an issue, and resolve it that way. Yes, that person may lie to you and tell you everything is peaches and rose petals. But if your gut instinct tells you something is wrong, then believe it. Because 9 times out of 10, your gut instinct is correct. And besides, if you don't trust or believe this person, why would you continue to have them in your life. No its not easy to give up on a relationship, especially if you've put a lot of time and effort into it. But does all the time and effort mean sacrificing your own happiness; your own sanity. I mean eventually, whether there is something to find or not, you will drive yourself nuts.
So if theirs an issue, confront it and move on. If you feel that something is amiss, then you need to talk it out or it's going to eat away at you and your relationship. Doing these side investigations, may help you feel better, but in the end, what is it really doing to you? It says more about you (and not in a good way), than it says about the person you're with. And even if you're right about whatever it is you find, what good does it do you; you're still left with questions and feeling hurt. Am I right or wrong? Please comment on this, especially the men out there (if any of the men read this), because we know that dudes get checked up on a lot more than us ladies do. :)
Happy Blogging All!
Monday, June 20, 2011
Monday Grievances
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| Photo Credit: Crotch Grab |
Gentlemen, are your balls that huge you must adjust them everywhere and anywhere at all times?! I apologize for starting my blog so roughly, but this is a topic that severely irks me. I see men, whether I want to or not, everyday, adjusting their package anywhere at anytime and its absolutely revolting. I get it, men have a penis and balls. These two friends dangle and I suppose get in the way. And I get that its hot, and depending on where these friends are dangling they may stick to areas such as your thigh. Trust me, I do understand this. HOWEVER it is not appropriate for you to start shifting your twig and berries in the middle of the street, a restaurant, an interview, a funeral, your child's graduation or anywhere else that's not the bathroom or somewhere else private. I mean Christ, you're not even discreet about it. You're just digging and adjusting like a genie is going to pop up if you do it just right. I had asked an ex-boyfriend of mine if he ever did this, and he told me that of course he did, but it wasn't something he wanted to broadcast to the world. So he'd excuse himself and do it where no one could see. And I will be forever thankful to him for that. So what's your problem, guys who do this incessantly?
Not to long ago I was walking home and these two men where walking in my direction. I wasn't paying any attention to them, until they got closer and I noticed they were both adjusting themselves; or scratching, who knows. But what floored me was that they just continued their conversation as if neither one of them was going to town on themselves. It was as if it was completely normal to do this. I'm sorry but WTF? Again, I totally comprehend the fact that adjustments need to be made and that to you it is completely normal. But it is NOT normal to do it out in the open like that! Another time I was witness to this nauseating move, was at a store, where a guy was sitting down talking to a girl. She seemed very interested in the conversation, but he seemed more interested in digging into his ball sack. You could totally tell the girl was trying to ignore it and kept talking and looking the other way, while the guy would stop and start up again. Like seriously guy? Did you skip a shower today? I just didn't understand how he could continue on his adventure and not feel at all embarrassed.
I still don't understand what makes this OK in society for men to just get up in there and start moving things around and/or scratching away. I see grown men doing this and I see teenagers and kids doing it. It's repulsive and frankly makes you look like a filthy person. If women started adjusting their thongs or scratching themselves in the nether regions in public, men would be just as disgusted and turned off to the point where they would most likely walk away in the middle of a conversation and make us feel gross and embarrassed. And let me tell you, when we shave or wax our areas, it itches like a motherfu**er when it grows back. But when that happens, we don't just get up in there and act like it's all gravy. Like "Yea, I'm scratchin' my woo woo, whats it too you?" What if we did? How would you like to hold a conversation with someone who's all up in their business and acts as if it's no big deal? Pretty sure you'd react more dramatically than we do. Am I wrong? And trust me should we and when we call you out on it, you get very defensive and say "I have to do it." No, you don't! And if you feel the need to, again, GO SOMEWHERE PRIVATE!!! Ladies, please tell me, am I alone in not even being offended by this, but just disgusted by it? Please sound off!!!! And men, please, sound off as well. What is it that I and every other woman in the world, just isn't grasping when it comes to you and little you & the twins?
Happy Blogging All!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Friends With Benefits...What Benefits?
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| Photo Credit: FWB |
Recently there have been some movies coming out with the idea of "Friends With Benefits" being the premise. Now if you don't know what that is, let me break it down for you. Two people, presumably pretty good friends or at least two consenting adults that know each other for more than 5 minutes a sandwich shop, decide that since they're both single and good looking, that it only makes perfect sense to hookup with each other; at least until they find someone else to eventually hook up with. The idea is that you can come and go as you please in this scenario and no one gets hurt and you definetly DON'T get feelings for each other, because you know what you're getting into. You with me now? OK, now where was I? Oh yea, so this taboo is popping up in movies, but has been popping up in real life situations everywhere for years! I've not only known people to have done this, but I too (cover your eyes mother) have involved myself in this type of situation. It was a looooong time ago when I was young and obviously more stupid than I am today. So just to touch upon my own experience, it did not end well. And that's the end of that story. Hahaha.
Now the reason I bring this up is because in these movies, its always the same thing. Boy/Girl suggest the idea to their friend and they both agree that it's a fabulous idea. Then something happens. Something no one saw coming, because see, it's not part of the rules. One of them begins to "fall in love" with their sex buddy. And in real life, that's usually what happens. HOWEVER, unlike real life, reel life has the MALE falling for the FEMALE and her pushing him away. Yes, the boy falls for the girl and she's the one that has an issue with it. And not only that, but the ending is always a happy one. They fight, they see the light, all becomes roses and butterflies. Now I've seen this in at least two movies recently, "No Strings Attached" and "I Hate Valentine's Day". And another moving coming out with this topic and the inevitable "boy falls for girl" outcome, is the movie appropriately titled, "Friends With Benefits". So why, with a topic so real, are they always changing the outcome? Is it because people go to the movies to be hypnotized by fantasies of things that can not and will not ever happen in their own lives? Its the same issue I have with movies where they show sex scenes and the guy just gets right in there. First of all, where's the awkward getting up to get the condom and the even more awkward moment of them trying to put it on? Also, why does no one ever say, "Yea, lets do this, but first, do you have any diseases I should know about?". What? Am I the only one that asks this? Eh, maybe that's why I'm single. Ha! So you can say that I'm being bitter, and maybe I am. However every person that I've spoken to about this topic, men and women alike, have always told me it's the same thing; girl falls for guy, guy loses interest. Its always the same roller coaster ride, except EVERYONE on this ride gets off, throwing up. I have only heard of one instance in which the male in the situation fell for the girl. And this was really because though she thought something could happen somewhere over the rainbow, he became fatal attraction within the first "meeting". But that's a different blog for a different day.
So what is it that intrigues people so much to actually try and make this silly concept work? Sure you can say that the benefit to this is great sex (if the person you choose is good, if not you're screwed, and not in a good way), not having to make him/her breakfast the next day because they're not staying over ('cause that is often against the rules as well), not having to remember to buy gifts for them on birthdays or holidays, not having to hang out with their crazy aunt Olga who feels the need to pinch everyone's ass and flick her tongue at them, not... Wait, I was against this right?... But in all seriousness, is it really worth it. I mean eventually aren't we getting to old for just a quick "bump & tickle". Am I alone in thinking someone would want to be with me and me alone? Is being in a relationship that scary that the concept of monogamy just flies out the window? Okay, don't answer that quickly, sheesh. But again, speaking from experience I've been there, done that. And it DOESN'T WORK! In my opinion, we're only human and eventually someone is going to fall; most likely the female because we're built to use our hearts to think and not our vagina's. AND jealously also becomes a factor in all this. You start to think "Well we're not really together, so I can get with this other dude/chick too." And then, men and women alike, get uptight and pissed off. For women its, "What? I'm not enough?" because how dare he consider leaving this situation for someone else's. And for men it becomes, "But that's mine." because how dare someone try to play with your toy, before you're done using it. And lastly, if this is a good friend, how do you go back to being friends later? How do you introduce you're new partner to your old sex chum? Trust me, it's gonna get weeeeiiiirrrrrd.
So ladies and gentleman, are you with me or against me on this? Please feel free to leave comments here and/or email me anytime, day or night at LaLatinaLoquita@gmail.com.
Happy Blogging All!
Monday, June 6, 2011
Monday Grievances
The other day I was walking home from work and passed by our local Library. As I approached the building, I noticed two kids, boy & girl, probably about 14 years old, if that, out front. As I got closer to the two of them I noticed that they were heavily making out. I mean seriously, I don't even think I've had a doctor check out my tonsils as thoroughly as these kids were checking each others. I thought to myself, "So that's what libraries are used for now. What the hell happened to just checking out a book and going home?" I was really shocked and disgusted by this image. I remember going to that very library when I was younger and trust me the last thing on my mind was making out with anyone; and yes I did have a boyfriend. I then thought to myself, "what the hell goes on INSIDE that place?" And then, "OMG! My sister goes to this Library!" As I walked passed them I made a "clearing of the throat" sound and they didn't even come up for air. I couldn't believe it. No shame at all. Hello, do you not watch 16 & Pregnant? Or is that you're trying to get on the show. Granted, maybe I'm taking the thought to far by insinuating that this make-out session would lead to that. HOWEVER, isn't this how it starts? And please tell me where the parents are? Shouldn't those kids have been home by then? It was 6p. Even in High School I had to be home by a certain time, or my Mother would start to freak. And I went to an all girl school.
So then again a few days after I see a bunch of kids coming out of the library. As I'm getting closer they're going on and on about some nonsense and the curses coming out of their mouths, where just disgusting. Now I won't pretend to be an angel, because yes, I cursed when I wasn't suppose to either. But hot damn the things they were saying were just jaw-dropping. And then of course as I walk by, some 13 year old little shit says, "Damn that's a booty" and he and his other little friends start laughing. I wanted so badly to turn around and tear into this little brats, but what would it matter. Its as if manners and being well behaved kids just doesn't exist anymore. When did this "fad" end? I mean yes, kids aren't going to be the cleanest mouthed or nicest beings in the world, but I would hope that their parents taught them enough to not act like this, especially in public. People always ask me why I have something against kids; why I "hate" them. This is exactly why people. And I can't even blame it on them completely. Not to long ago on one of my train rides into the city, a woman (maybe the mother or grandmother, I couldn't tell) was telling a little girl about 8 years old that she was not to play with that "little faggot". She kept going on and on that unless the teacher said she had too, to not speak or play with "the little faggot". She must have said that phrase about a dozen times and the little girl just looked at her as if it was normal and said OK. OK? OK? No, it is not at all OK! I can't believe that this is what's raising children nowadays. And this is exactly why when I walk by our neighborhood Library, anything but studying and school work seems to be going on.
So I have to ask my readers, the ones who are parents specifically, what do you think of this? I understand that after a certain age you give your child freedom to come home a little later than they used to; to do a lot of different things they weren't able to previously. Maybe they're in an after school club or sport. Or they want to go shopping with a friend for an hour. But when I see things like this, I have to wonder what the hell is going on that they find it OK, to not only make out HEAVILY in front of a library, but in public. Or to act so bold and spew the most vile things out of their mouths to grown ups and act as if everything is roses and butterflies in the world. It's a disgusting display and I'm starting to think that the old fashion idea of a beat down, needs to come back into play. Yea, what happened to that "fad"?
Happy Blogging All!
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