Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Toe-To-Toe Tuesday: Breaking Points - When Are You Done?

So it's been said that everyone has their breaking point in all different kinds of situations.  You have a breaking point with a friend who's constantly complaining about her weight. You finally just tell her to put the cookies and ice cream down and get her fluffy ass to the gym.  You have you're breaking point with a family member who's constantly asking you to bail them out.  You get frustrated one day and tell them that you're not there parent and to figure it out for themselves.  Whatever and whomever it is, everyone has their breaking point.  But when you're dating and are getting to know someone, what's the breaking point where you just realize, "Yea, this ain't happening"?

Well as you all know I have my "limits" and "breaking points" mainly because I'm picky.  But also because I feel like I'm a good catch and if I'm coming into something offering this much (imagine me holding my hands really far apart as if I'm measuring something big like a stove) and you're coming into the same thing offering this much (imagine me holding hands A LOT closer together so that a DVD box could barely between my hands) then we have a problem.  Call me crazy, call me conceited, call me spoiled or call me the girl who's never gonna find love, but some things just don't have wiggle room for a bargain.  So here are some...

Points That Make Me Break:
  1. He has kids.  We've already gone over this.  Me + Kids = BOMB! I do not want to deal with Baby Mama drama or kids that think I'm invading there space.  Nope, nope and NOPE.  You can read how I feel on that subject here, in case you forgot or didn't catch it "This guy has kids on it; take it back."
  2. He's 30 and either has no job or is a aspiring fry cook at McDonalds.  Don't get me wrong, working at Mickey D's is fine. If you were laid off and that's all you can do now, OK.  However after a certain age if you're not a Manager of like 5 stores or something, there is an issue. I mean where's your motivation? I know people have to do what they have to do, but come on.  And unless you've been laid off and are currently looking (like I am) or are the heir to the Crisco Oil fortune, then you shouldn't be out of work at that age.  I don't want to hear that you're finding yourself or that no one understood you at your last job.  Life's tough. Suck it up and be a man.
  3. He lives at home with his mommy.  I'm sorry, I just can't deal with that.  Now yes, double standard, 'cause I live at home with mine.  But there is a difference. I'm a girl!  Its much more dangerous for a woman to live on her own than it is a man.  I don't know many women that live on their own; and those that do have roommates.  But a man that lives at home with his mother just bothers me.  What happens if we want to be alone?  Gotta wait for momma to run out to the store so we can get a quicky in?  Nah, I'm good, moving on.  I mean I get everyone has special circumstances, but I've only heard one or two instances where it was acceptable.  Being a lazy ass 'cause mommy cooks, cleans and does your laundry are not any of them.
  4. He's still talking about the latest Jordan's he's going to buy as if he's in HS.  I love sneakers just as much as the next person.  I wear them EVERYDAY.  But I don't make them my life.  There is nothing more annoying than a man who goes on and on about something, especially something so silly as sneakers. I knew a guy that had sneakers in all colors and all types.  These were air force one's and these were dunks and this and that. And all I kept thinking was, what happens when you're broke? You gonna live in them sneakers?  I swear if there was a fire, he would've saved those sneakers before his momma.
  5. He wants to go "dutch" on the first date.  And not only that, but you look at me like I'm stupid for even thinking you would pay.  Yea, no.  You asked me out, you pay.  I don't care if I picked the place, or that I have a job (which I currently don't) or that I pretended to reach in for my wallet.  Chivalry is not dead, your brain is; so revive that bitch.  Hey I always offer (and usually do) to leave the tip... sidenote: when it comes to dinner DO NOT answer your phone.  Unless it's your parent or grandparent, you should not be chatting it up at the dinner table.
  6. He talks about the expensive things that he has or how much money he has.  "Oh yea I'm gonna buy this car." "Yo I'm getting a Raymond Weil watch." "Yo my underwear was once owned by Usher."  Dude I don't care what you have, I like you for you, but you're pushing it.  If you're gonna go on and on about all your treasures but you can't pay for a meal, then you need to be gone.  I'm not materialistic at all, so things like that DO NOT impress me.  Now tell me you just installed a deep fryer in your kitchen, and then we'll talk, 'cause fatty loves to eat.
  7. He doesn't drive. I'm sorry, call me critical, but a man should drive.  Even I finally got my license.  I'm not saying he has to have a car, those mofos are expensive, so I understand.  But at least KNOW how to drive.  There is nothing sexier than a guy that drives, drives fast and knows his shit when it comes to cars.
  8. He knocks EVERYTHING. "I hate those reality shows; they're so stupid." "Why do girls have big bags, it's ridiculous." "Why does the sun shine, it's too bright, I don't like it." I mean a guy that complains and knocks everything is so unattractive.  I get that you don't like it, that's your opinion and that's great.  If you don't agree with me that's fine; no one ever does.  But sometimes somethings should just be left alone.  Don't beat a dead horse; its dead.  No one likes a whiner.  You hate when women do it, so stop.
  9. He doesn't talk. I don't remember agreeing to date a mute guy. I don't want to have to constantly keep coming up with topics to get a guy to talk.  If you like me and want to talk to me, I would assume that you have SOMETHING to say to me.  And if not, why did you ask me out?
  10. He's hairy. I'm sorry, I don't want to date a German Shepard. I did it once, and suddenly out of nowhere it became comfortable and cool for him to ask me to shave his back. Yuck! (And this is why you cut it off right away).
  11. He criticizes the fact that I don't wear "girly clothes" or makeup.  Listen, I can get dressed up and fabulous just as much as the next girl.  But there is a time and place.  I find no need to wear 5 inch heels and 10lbs of eyeshadow to the movies.  I am a laid back girl, and unless you met me in a club where obviously I was dressed up, then you'll see as soon as you meet me that I dress comfortable and for myself.
  12. He can't take my sarcasm or humor.  I'm hyper, always laughing and I'm not afraid to make a fool of myself.  If you're serious and straight laced, then you and I will never click.  I do a lot of silly, crazy and frustrating things that easily get on peoples nerves and if you get annoyed easily, it turns me off. So lets both get out now, 'cause inside this girl lives a little frat boy.
  13. He invites me to his house, and his bathroom looks as if he has dirty trolls living in the cabinets that come out at night.  Clean your place up you dirty hamster.
  14. He's a smoker.  I dated someone once that smoked and it was like I was licking an astray every time we kissed. It was really nasty...  This applies to pot smokers as well.  Mainly because you're not working at a comic book shop and you're not 18 anymore. 
  15. He is constantly making references to his last girlfriend/relationship.  I'm not a therapist, so stop telling me that she took your Flatscreen TV and burned your clothes. First of all, DRAMA! Second of all if you want to talk about it that much, obviously something is still there and you shouldn't be dating period...  And ladies quick note if he was engaged and wears that engagement ring around his neck to remind him of his mistakes, you run like you're trying out for the Olympics and don't stop until you're in another country.
  16. He's a cat person, not a dog person.  You don't like dogs, you don't like me. Take that as you wish. ;)
Now I definitely have a lot more limits, but I figure #16 is the number to stop at because you probably already stopped reading after #6.   So what are your deal breakers?  Can you see where I'm coming from or do you have a completely different point of you?  I'd love to read your comments.  And while we wait, check in with Mr. Ozymandias to see what he says are his breaking points with the ladies.

Happy Blogging All!

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