Thursday, July 19, 2012

Delusions of Grandeur

In today's world, and heck probably before our time, people have a tendency to stretch the truth or just out right lie.  Lies can start of small and work themselves into bigger and deeper ones.  Now you all know how I feel about lying, no matter how small it is.  I truly don't see the point in it.  I've always tried to speak my mind and tell people how I feel, even if I know it will upset them.  And yes, this goes for people I don't know either.  When I meet someone, I don't feel it necessary to hold back, but I also don't find it necessary to lie or talk myself up into something I'm not.  That brings us to the topic at hand.

Lately I've been dating and meeting new "men", and I've found they all have one common trait: they're all full of shit!  Now don't get me wrong, before I get men attacking me for once again not giving them the benefit of the doubt. I'm not saying EVERY man lies or is full of it.  However, in my experience, it just seems to go hand in hand with men.  Lying comes as naturally as scratching their balls; it's in their genes.  And you know what, it's actually not just my experience.  I was hanging out with a friend recently and she told me a story of how she met a great guy and they started on that journey of "getting to know you."  He talked about how he wanted to find a great girl and settle down. He told her all these great things, and it wasn't that she ate it up with a spoon, but she had no reason to believe he was lying.  She didn't necessary fall for everything he was selling, but she felt she could at least relate & agree with him.  They decided to go on a date, and when it was about to end, he suggested her going with him to meet his parents, that evening.  She thought, it was a bit much too soon, so she declined.  For about two weeks they continuing speaking & things seemed to be going well.  But then, it began to dwindle to almost nothing.  She decided to contact him one day and tell him she thought his communication was slipping.  Suddenly the guy who was ready to settle down & find a great girl, told her that she needed someone who was more attentive and that the timing was off.  Now most people reading this are probably thinking, "Well you can't believe everything people tell you." or "Well he was probably only looking for one thing, and told you all those things to try and get it." Except, friends, he didn't even get IT.  And if it was for that, then don't you think he went about it the wrong way?! So then why all the bullshit in the beginning, to then just go MIA; what was the purpose?!

Now that brings me to the two instances that I have gone through.  The first is a guy who I've always had a crush on.  Smart, funny, great job and total player.  I figured out long ago that he would probably just be a friends with benefits kind of "friend" and as much as I liked him, I thought, so be it.  And while you all know I DON'T condone that kind of relationship, sometimes a girls "needs" need to be met; SORRY MOM, but come on, am I right ladies... *wait's for high fives*... Moving along.  Now I told this guy that I understood that this was the nature of our relationship and I was completely okay with it.  But he kept saying, "Well let's see where it goes." and, "You never know." and blah blah blah.  He kept saying all these things, that I suppose he thought I wanted to hear. But I didn't. I was completely comfortable with what was going on and I made it quite clear I was. So again, why all the bullshit?  We both know what this is, so who exactly are you trying to convince here? Or is that what you really want? And that's where more confusion comes in.

My second situation, and I'll keep this short, happened more recently.  I met someone, who at first my gut said, "You should steer clear from of situation.", however none of the reasons I thought of were, he's going to try and sell you some story.  We spoke for a short time, and it was actually a great conversation.  During our talk he told me about what he was looking for, blah blah blah and how into me he was and that we should try to see where things could go and even mentioned going on a date soon.  I decided to throw caution to the wind (and yes, I know you're thinking, "Hello, they signs were already there", but they weren't the signs you think.) I said okay, lets see where it could go.  We spoke for a few days and then *POOF*, he mysteriously, and with no explanation, pulled a Houdini and vanished.  It made completely no sense to me.  You pursued me and said you wanted to go on a date; not the other way around.  So of course I'm left saying, "Huh? What was the point of saying all that stuff?"

Now I've asked others, men and woman alike, why these guys would lie and feed us these bullshit fantasy lines. They say, simply because we believe it.  I've been told that women should never buy into what men say and that we should always assume that men will always make things up, make themselves out to be these great people and will just basically be douchebags.  So my question is, if I'm suppose to assume that everything that comes out of a man's mouth is pure garbage, then how am I suppose to ever get into and make a relationship work?  How do people move into that next phase, if they're already going into the situation assuming the worse of the person?  Now I'm not saying you should believe every single thing a person says, and of course you should be cautious. However, I just can't fathom being able to really get to know someone by playing these games and believing every person I meet is going to bullshit me; especially not at my age.  See, those things were cute when we were in our early 20's, but at this point, you would think, even if someone didn't want a relationship, the could at least be honest and upfront and say what it is they do want.  And if we are to accept the idea that everyone has an agenda and will lie to you, then what about the lines of, "You can't carry the baggage of what someone did to you before, into the future" or "You can't believe everyone is a liar."  If I'm believing everything he says is a lie, isn't that exactly what I'm doing?

Dating is a confusing thing and if this is what the "game" is, then I'd like no part of it. No, thanks! So I'm thinking, ladies, that we just get ourselves a great vibrator, and that'll probably be our best bet for now. And no, that is NOT bitter.  That simply means, we've gotta have some kind of fun until the men decide to wise up and be honest; no matter what that honesty entails.  So lets grab a glass of wine, read our filthy 50 Shades of whatever and say, "Screw you relationships & your delusions of grandeur!" :)

No Longer Accepting Delusions,
La Latina Loquita


  1. Well said lil mama.

  2. *high five*
    In my many years on this earth I've come to believe three things, 1.) Retail therapy solves 99% of my issues. 2.) Diets don't work. 3.) Men lie.