Sunday, December 26, 2010

We Stink!...What I learned at Midnight Mass.

This past Friday Night/Saturday Morning my family & I went to Midnight mass.  My uncle & I were the worst, because we thought the Church was sure to fall at the sight of us entering. But we passed the test and made it through. So then Mass began at 12:05a. Now we have two Priests at our Church, because it was a bilingual Mass. One priest speaks Spanish and the worse English I've ever heard; My grandmother sounds fluent in English compared to him (though you don't know my grams, trust me that means something. lol). Also he loves to sing rather than read; so when he's reading the scriptures, he's really singing them. The other priest doesn't speak...he YELLS! For example (work with me here) he begins, "AND JOSEPH WENT TO THE INN AND WAS TURNED AWAY but sought shelter in the stables. AND WHEN MARY DELIVERED THE LORD AND SAVIOR the wise men appeared". You get the picture.  After the readings, as always the Priest speaks. So here came our Spanish speaking priest to teach us what Christmas is all about:

1. "Santa Klau-se. Das how ju say righ? Well eh Santa, is NOT real" (Yes, the "SANTA IS NOT REAL" comment he says in almost perfect English. Ummm there are kids out here, can we keep it down. Sheesh)
2. "Santa Klau-se" came from da Coca Cola coporachon. Don't drink the Coca Cola." (OK, wow now we're gonna ruin Coca Cola's rep? Calm down Padre. This isn't the "Lets attack everything none religious" sermon. It's Christmas dude, relax.)
3. "Chrimas here, is all bout biznest." And with that he rubbed his two little fingers together almost like the Grinch.
4. "Chrimas is not bout da presents & gifts, is bout God send us gift of his chil to deliver our souls from evil."
5. "Our souls, hearts, are full of poo poo. Your heart is full of... pues tu sabe." (OOOOK.) Inside WE STINK." So at this point my uncle looks at my mom and I and goes, "You brought me to church so they can tell me I stink?" And at that I'm in tears of laughter.
6. Jesus was born in da manger (now this word he had a hard time trying to figure it out; he was trying to say stable but just couldn't figure it out) where da animals did their biznest. A sign dat we STINK and he here to cleanse." (I look at my uncle again who is pinching his nose.) 

I must say the other Priest was a lot nicer (and louder) and just told us to remember what the day is really about and to love others and be there for each other the way the Lord is always there for us. 

At the very end of the Mass ( about 1:30a or so) they brought out 3 "GIFTS"...Umm I thought that's not what this day was about?...The Spanish speaking Priest kept emphasizing that this was a "Free" raffle that we all entired; meanwhile this is after they stuffed baskets in our faces for money...Side note, my mom gave money for all of us, and the guy was still staring at me. Funny... So he starts asking if we all have our halves of the raffle tickets submitted. However those that did enter, recieved it in the previous weeks Sunday Mass (which obviously almost none of us at this Mass had attended) so the people that won where...1. Random Person. 2. The Principle of the School 3. Someone that works in the Cafeteria of the School.  Ha! All in all it was a good Midnight Mass that made us think, laugh and take a shower when we got home.  Hopefully your Christmas with your families was just as interesting and enjoyable.

Here are a few photos of our Christmas.

Me by our flourshing Tree

 My sister putting little baby Jesus in his manger

Baby Jesus resting comfortably after a long journey from our China cabinet to his manger.

My uncle not paying attention to the birth of our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. He was on level 20 of Bookworm. Priorities people, Priorities!
Happy Blogging All!


  1. jajajaj ke chisotosa eres! I hate going to church when they make u feel guilty about padre goes down the aisle asking questions to see who was paying attention i hate it!

  2. Oh. Hell. No. I would not be down with that, because I never pay attention. When I go to church its for myself; I never listen to the priest. I would fail that test. Ha!