Saturday, January 29, 2011

Children Today... WTF Is Going On?!

OK, let me just start by saying, in case you're new, I do not have any children.  I know what you're thinking, "Thank God for that" and I agree.  But I also, believe it or not, don't have an issue with children even though maybe my previous posts might show a different opinion.  I actually do like children. But I like them more when I can give them back.   Now I do have an 11 year old sister, whom I've helped raised, and trust me have tried to give back numerous times; still no takers. So in my opinion, that gives me the authority to comment on the subject of children and why some of them need a good 'ol fashion ASS WHOOPIN'!

What brought me to this topic was an interview I read on AOL on Parenting.   Amy Chua, who was the woman being interviewed, currently has a book that goes into parenting the Chinese Way, which is described as a strong focus on academics, total respect for parents and few choices to be made by the children (if you'd like to read the article, here is the link: Amy-Chua-Chinese-Parenting).  In the article she describes her parenting as being very strict, talking down to her children and how she set very specific and strict ground rules for her children.  This in her opinion, makes the children smarter, believe in themselves more and they grow up with a sense of respect for their elders and themselves.  Though she did experience push back with her second child and wishes she had done some things different, she still believes in these rules.  And though I may not have read her book, I have to say that I agree with her already.   I don’t think it’s an accident or just a coincidence that we don’t see any Chinese or Japanese teens on Teen Mom or The Maury Povich Show.   Or for that matter anyone from Europe or Asia.  You don’t hear about high statistics of unwed teen mothers in countries overseas.  Now don’t go jumping down my neck, but I’m not going to sit here and get actual facts and figures, because yes, I’m sure that they have their share.  I’m just going on by what I read and see in the news and with my own eyes.

For example, today I went to my local Rite Aid store and while waiting online I heard this mother yelling at her three kids.  She was screaming at the top of her lungs for them to stop, as the children ran around the store taking down toy cars, messing with body washes on the shelves and just plain being pains in the ass.  She just kept yelling for them to stop, and they just would not listen.  At one point she lifted her hand as if to hit them, but even the “threat” of getting a beat down did nothing to stop these little monsters.  Now this mother had to be somewhere in her late 30’s, which in my opinion means she was probably really their grandmother.  Hey, don’t judge me for judging them, because I live in the BX and normally that’s how people roll down here.  Anyway, this incident made me think of another time I was in this very Rite Aid… Side note: this is not a bash on Rite Aid, it’s just where I happen to spend a lot of my time because I love drugstores J  So while I was looking to buy some delicious Pepperidge Farm Sausalito Milk Chocolate Macadamia cookies, these two kids, a girl & a boy about 12 or 13, where getting scolded by store security.  The security guard kept asking the girl to give up what she had in the bag, because he knew she took it.  Her “accomplice”, a young boy I assumed was her brother, kept saying it was nothing, until finally I guess he couldn’t take the guilt and asked her to just give it back.  When the girl turned in whatever she had taken the security guard told her he had to take her to the back and call her parents, and then they walked away.  I went to purchase my cookies at the register where I saw two girl, probably no more than 20 years old, standing with a baby who was about maybe 3.  One girl starts saying, “But where are they? They should’ve have gotten it and been out by now.”  Another girl, who had to be younger than both of them, came by saying, “Oh, they got caught. They’re in the back calling your mom.”  One of the 20 year olds starts screaming something along of the lines of “Imma about to set it off in here.  That’s some bullshit. It’s not even that serious.  They didn’t even take nothing big.”  What I took from this was that these two geniuses either sent these two impressionable kids to steal something for them or knew that they wanted to steal something and allowed it.  And all I could think was, “This is the example we’re setting for our children?

What has happened to the parenting of today?  Why are some parents just as immature as their children?  Why are some older siblings and cousins, not setting an example either? See I’m saying some, because this blog isn’t about attacking all parents or other adult parent figures; I’m not attacking anyone at all.  I’m merely discussing many of the instances I’ve seen around me when it comes to children nowadays and their parents.  So this isn’t to say that every parent out there is horrible, because they’re amazing parents out there.  But then there are those that are just ridiculous and should be tested and examined before they have children.  Just the other day I saw two women arguing and cursing at each other on the train, and one of them had a little girl with her.  And when I say cursing, I mean words being used that even I was shocked to hear.  They looked like they couldn’t have been more than 20 or 21 years of age.  Is it that we have some many babies having babies?  Again, I know it’s not all young girls because I have friends and family members that had children at very young ages and they’re extremely good parents.  However it has to do with the type of young girls and women having children.  Have you watched 16 & Pregnant or Teen Mom or even Beyond Scared Straight?  It disgusting when you see these babies, because that’s what they are, having children, acting up, running around thinking they’re adults and not knowing the first clue of how to take care of themselves let alone another human being.  They get pregnant and think that now they have a living doll they can dress up and play with.  But that is not what being a parent is about.  And where are these girls’ mothers?  Out clubbing it up when they’re about to be grandmothers and not paying attention.  And where are the fathers?  The men that actually have stayed around to raise their children, get little or no respect from them, and decide to let them do whatever they want; because to them that will teach them a lesson.  And in the end who gets stuck raising these kids; the Grandparents.  Or what about that kid that sells a bag of weed and makes 20 bucks and thinks that’s the way to grow into being a billionaire one day?  What happened to the days when a kid even considered talking back or disrespecting their parents, and was already slapped across the face because the parent just knew what they were thinking.   Don’t misunderstand me, I don’t believe in violence and I definitely don’t believe in child abuse.  But with all these groups that “fight” for children like Child Welfare Services, these kids are taking advantage.  Even when I was young I’d tell my mom I was going to call BCW on her, and the worse thing she ever did was tell me she was disappointed I got a D on a Math test.   But even then, I would’ve never done something like that.  For some reason, though my mother never laid a hand on me, I was terrified of her and it was mostly out of respect.  This woman put clothes on my back, food in my mouth and paid for my education, even when she herself had to go hungry to do so.  How in the world could I disrespect my mother?  And that’s the main problem!  Children are so spoiled and have no idea what it is to live in the real world, so that act disrespectful to their parents and everyone else.  I’m telling you, once they get away with something once; it’s all downhill from there.

I see young kids raising other kids and it scares me for both of them.  I see these kids who skip school to sell candy on the train, explaining how it’s going to better them, and I’m appalled.   They’re still children themselves.  They listen to hardcore rap music in front of their own kids, cruse up a storm and when the kid repeats it they laugh and make it seem like this is ok behavior.  None of this is OK, and we really need to step up our game in watching and helping them out.  Kids nowadays have no concept of respect and responsibility, and I’m not sure where it was lost along the way, but it was.  Let’s stop glorifying the wrong things that they do.  It’s not cute for a 15 year old to be pregnant, so I’m sorry there will be no baby shower for you dear.  Will I help to make sure you go to school, graduate so you can better your life for yourself and your child; of course.  But am I going to sit here and by your baby the latest Jordan’s or a baby bag made by Coach.  No, you’re out of your GOT DAMN MIND.  If you come home with a D and think you’re going to the “Library” to hang with your friends. HELL NO!  You’re going to sit your behind down and study, and if you don’t like my way, get a job and move out!  I have no problem with tough love.  I guarantee when they realize they can’t do anything for themselves, they will straighten up.  Let’s start worrying about education, what you’re going to be when you are an adult finally, and stop worrying about boys, sex and wearing the latest and greatest styles.  First of all boys come and go. Second of all sex will be there for the rest of your life.  Third of all, those great styles will be out of style next week.  So Parents, Adults, Educators etc, talk to the children you know and even those you don’t, about what life is really about.  Give them the facts of life and stop making excuses for them.  I had a strong and amazing mother who was very open with me at a young age and to this day will lay it out on the line and tell me the truth without any filters.  And you know what, I’m so much better than I probably would’ve been if she had held back and have avoided quite a few mistakes in my life because of it.

Happy Blogging All

1 comment:

  1. I have 3 kids and I totally agree with you. Kids nowadays are too damn spoiled and the parents are letting them be. Not me!

    At times I curse at home when I'm pissed off but I always tell my kids, the second I hear you talk like that, I will slap the crap out of you. Great post cuzzo!